I ain’t a big fan of Will Ferrell’s brand of comedy, or of Jay Roach, director of the Austin Powers films and Meet the Parents. (Meet the Parents is funny, but crude. Austin Powers is just plain crude.) But I may just watch their newest movie The Campaign for one reason, and one reason only:
Dylan McDermott. Oh my gawsh, this man is still all kinds of HAAWWTTT. Mm-hmm. (I absolutely refuse to believe he’s 50 years old. Mistake with the birth certificate.) When I went to see The Dark Night Rises – ok, I need to add an interjection here. The third installment of the Batman series has an “S” at the end of its title. RiseS. Koreans apparently choose to disagree, because the Korean title is “Da-keuh Na-ee-teuh Ra-ee-jeuh” (다크 나이트 라이즈) aka “Dark Knight Rise.” UUUUGGGGHHHH. *face palm* I really really reaaally don’t have very many pet peeves, but Koreans and their butchering of English get to me. Every. Single. Time. I understand it sounds waaay cooler to say “Dark Knight Rise” in Korean than to add the extra syllable, but come on. It’s really quite hilarious, and I only snark about it because my own madre likes to say the darndest things in Konglish.
End of interjection about wrong movie and back to the reason I’m writing. DYLAN MCDERMOTT. So, I went to see The Dark Knight Rises a few weeks ago, and they played the trailer for The Campaign. It does look pretty funny, and I was quietly chuckling when bam! There in the background, behind Marty Huggins (played by Zach Galifianakis), was THE MAN dressed oh so fine in all black. I have a weakness for guys who can pull off turtlenecks. And it wasn’t just any guy in any turtleneck. It was the bluest eyes you’ve ever seen complemented by some seriously sexy scruff – or maybe it’s just a five o’clock shadow – and there I was, gasping like a caught trout. Or maybe a beached whale. Anyhow, my mind was screaming all kinds of joyful exclamations as the face I haven’t seen in nearly a decade stared back at me in all its glory. Cue whirring brain trying to dig through all the junk accumulated over the years aka differential equations, chemical reactions, opening stanzas of Beethoven’s Fifth, plate tectonics, and dual luciferase assay. It only took a few seconds for me to finally (though silently) crow, “Dylan McDermott!”
Who is this Golden-Globe-winning hottie that is enjoying a second journey to stardom? I absolutely fell in love nearly a decade(!) ago when I stumbled upon popular American legal drama The Practice. Many nights were spent sitting mere inches away from the television on mute as la familia went to dreamland and I enjoyed my own dreamland starring Bobby Donnell, J.D. And then I found Dylan McDermott in the remake of Miracle on 34th Street, starring the adorable Mara Wilson, aka Matilda. Years passed, and I forgot about Mr. Hottie until he suddenly burst back into my life with The Campaign. Turns out he’s been receiving lots of praise this past year as Dr. Ben Harmon on cable’s biggest new series American Horror Story. I’m considering The Campaign, but I ain’t doin’ no horror, not even for Mr. Hottie.
It’s pretty darned hot these days and nowhere near Thanksgiving, much less Christmas, but it looks like I’m gonna be lookin’ for my Miracle on 34th Street Laserdisc(!!) tonight.